Page 05 >Ah... That day the earth cracked open, and when I awoke, I had fallen in... >Ah... that day the earth cracked open, and while I was walking, I fell in... I think boke might've misread this line, the verb here is 歩いてたら, not 起きたら Page 08 >But the fact that she only talked to me, her old friend, / At the time, probably made me happy. >But she only willingly talked to me, her old friend. / At the time, I think it made happy. Just a suggestion, I think the original line is a little awkward. Page 09 >Why... >... Why? I think this matches the original, and fits with the flow of the lines a bit better. Page 10 >Yesterday, there was a group presentation... /And it was my fault that it was ruined... >We had a group presentation yesterday... /And I completely ruined it. Again, just a suggestion for flow. Page 13 >So having to clean is not gonna work for me, see... >So, I don't have time to clean, see...? Page 16 >An email... I think this should probably be translated as "A message..." or "A text...". >What's with this morning? Did something happen? >What's wrong? Did something happen this morning? "What's with this morning" just seems kind of odd to me. Page 17 >Hm... >... Huh? >And... lunch, and after school... >And... lunch, and after school, too... think this makes it a bit more clear what she means. Page 18 >What are you... >What are you― I think if we're gonna have the line cut off here, then it should end with a dash. >Go... >... go. I think what's going on here is she's not voicing the beginning of this line and only coming in audibly for the end? The "Go..." just looks kind of off to me, but maybe "... go." doesn't look any better. I don't know. Page 19 >I know since I've been watching Aki all this time after all. >I know. I've been watching Aki all this time, after all. Just feel like this reads a little better. Page 25 >You suddenly didn't like me anymore, right? >I thought you didn't like me anymore... >It's... >No! >I can't... be together with you, Iku-chan. /So that's why... >It's because... I can't be together with you, /Iku-chan. I'm pretty sure the だから here is making this statement an explanation for the previous line. She's saying she started avoiding Iku-chan not because she dislikes her, but because it'd be wrong for her to stay with her. It's not here to link this line to the next one. >I'm always causing you trouble... / and you're still sticking with me... >You sticking with me... / even though I'm always causing you trouble. Page 28 >If that's the reason, can I stay with you? >Since that's my reason, can I stay with you? "If that's the reason" sounds like she's asking her, when this is actually her telling her.